6/4/13
Hello Mayor Ford,
Perhaps you are aware that this Thursday evening is The Power Plant Contemporary Art Gallery’s yearly gala, Power Ball. Today I won two complimentary VIP tickets to Power Ball and I would be honoured if you would attend with me!
Winning the tickets meant winning a contest of embarrassing proportions. Eleven years ago, a student art project gone wrong made me an international media sensation. I had to be cut out of a full-body plaster cast after being stuck in it for more than five hours. I got the most memorable bikini wax of my life when the mold was eventually sawed off at Kingston General Hospital.
The bizarre experience was voted best story on CBC’s As It Happens, and was picked up multiple times by the international news wire – only adding to my shame.
You yourself have had a recent stint of unfair and relentless media coverage. Maybe we could toast our experiences over a free Kronenbourg?
I think this could be a really fun evening.
The VIP party starts at 8pm.
***
Tomorrow please don’t vote for his brother
shewasavisitor 
Nicely penned.